New Me

My future~ I can't predict, but I can plan for it.

Yes I know, I've said the same thing over and over but the results are always disappointing. I am sick of it! I hate failing in everything I do! I feel useless and I refuse to have the feelings again because I realized that no matter how hard I tried, the results will always be same!

I have to change! Yeah that's right. I just noticed that all my failure are caused by my own attitude and behavior . I am not saying that I am a nice person all this time but that kind of attitude have made some people steps on me and stab my back.

I won't let that thing happen anymore. Remember when I told you about the people who only noticed and mind about my existence when they need something? Hell yeah, those days are over, fools. You can't fool me again with those phony smiles! You only make me annoyed! Pfft! Give me something but excuses!

Who are they? I promise you I will never lose anything if I stop communicating with those type of people. Those people never brings me any benefits, not at all! So, why would I be care about giving any damn? I will never force myself to be nice to those people who are nothing but a big time selfish!

So, as I was saying, when I go back to my college, I want to make sure that I will do exactly what my mind says. No, I won't let my heart controls me. If my heart insist, I want it to have a deal with my mind first. Allah SWT will always guide me no matter what. He understands me and I believe that everything I do, he knows my reason and that's for sure!

I don't force anyone to understands all my reasons, all I care is that Allah SWT knows all my intentions! So what I expects most of the people who never tired to used me to know that they should start to grow up and go own their own because that is what they supposed to do!

It was stupid of me of being nice all the time and being patience towards those lame-o's. I can be mean but I refuse. So I think, the best thing I can do is to IGNORE.. .

I STILL GOT TIME IN THIS SEMESTER HOLIDAY.

These days are enough to discover my true self and to improve my attitude along with my behavior.. :)
My vacation helps me a lot. Thanks to my big family all people involved in curing my feelings :') So, whatever comes after this, I will face and deal with it!! !

Thanks for the 'rainbow' too, ya Allah yang Maha Esa.

Auf Wiedersehen!